Aiman Azlan's Blog

MESEJ UTAMA Perasaan cinta tidak dapat dikawal; ia kerap kali datang tanpa diundang. Ada yang boleh lalui zaman universiti tanpa bercinta, tapi ada ramai yang tidak boleh.  Perasaan itu satu perkara normal dan neutral, ia jadi salah atau betul bergantung kepada apakah perbuatan kita hasil daripada perasaan tersebut. Dua soalan yang patut ditanyakan kepada diri sendiri apabila dilanda perasaan cinta: Bolehkah aku serius dengan individu tersebut? Jika tidak boleh serius, apakah yang patut aku lakukan untuk usaha ke arah serius dan kawal diri in the mean time? Serius dalam bercinta bermakna perkahwinan dan tidak ada takrifan lain. Jika mampu serius, maka luahkan hasrat untuk berkahwin dengannya dalam masa yang terdekat (bukan bertahun-tahun akan datang). Dalam masa yang terdekat tersebut, boleh gunakan masa tersebut untuk sesi suai kenal (bukan dating). Jika tidak mampu untuk serius, maka Islam berikan puasa sebagai satu mekanisma untuk mengawal diri. Ia satu mekanisma yang t...

Mesej utama: Istiqamah tidak bermaksud tidak berubah (graf mendatar) atau improve sentiasa (graf meningkat tanpa penurunan). Istiqamah bermaksud kita naik apabila kita turun (graf naik turun). Umpama iman kita yang naik turun. Sebagai manusia, kita akan terjatuh. Istiqamah adalah untuk bangkit setiap kali kita jatuh. Salah satu helah syaitan adalah apabila kita jatuh, dia yakinkan kita bahawa kita perlu kekal jatuh dan rasa diri sendiri tidak berguna atau tidak layak untuk bangkit semula.

Mesej utama: Jangan fikir masalah anak-anak muda adalah masalah generasi ini sahaja; lumrah pemuda sama sepanjang zaman, hanya ujian sahaja yang berbeza. Pemberontakan, walaupun konotasinya negatif, tidak kesemuanya salah kerana ada ketika pemuda memberontak untuk menentang perkara yang salah.  Isunya bukan pemberontakan, tetapi cara pemberontakan yang tidak hikmah.  Semangat pemuda perlu dipandu, bukan dipadam. Pemuda perlukan bantuan mereka yang lebih tua untuk memandu semangat memberontak ke arah yang produktif. Pemuda perlu lebih mesra dan bergaul dengan mereka yang lebih tua. Mereka yang lebih tua juga perlu lebih mesra dan bergaul dengan mereka yang lebih tua. Ini hubungan dua hala, tidak patut dituju kepada satu pihak sahaja.

When I was in secondary school, my English teacher taught me the difference between the word “alone” and “lonely”. Alone is a physical state, where you are all by yourself physically. Nobody else is around you. For example, you are alone in your room. You are literally by yourself. Being alone is not an issue. Lonely is an emotional state, where you feel like you are alone even though there are other people around you. You somehow feel isolated in your own world and you feel like nobody is there to share your experience. You can be lonely in a crowded room. Loneliness is an issue. If you are lonely, try to reach out and open a little bit of a room for someone to enter your world. I know, it is easier said than done. But you might surprise yourself by having someone else who is experiencing something similar to what you are experiencing. Maybe you are not the only one in the world with that problem. Knowing that doesn’t make the problem go away, but it does remove the feeli...

I’m really passionate about becoming a motivational speaker, but what I’m usually afraid of is that people misunderstanding the message that I’m trying to convey. Can you explain more on how to overcome this? I think all public speakers have that fear, whether they are beginners or pros. Personally, I think it is a good fear to have because it keeps you careful. But, when it’s not in check, this fear can be paralizing and it can stop you from doing the things that you want to do. So I think as with any fear, the first thing to do is to face it. 1. Embrace the risk. Accept the fact that there will always be a possibility that people misunderstand you. Don’t delude yourself by thinking that you will make it perfect every time. That’s not going to happen. You’re a human being and your audience are human beings, and there’s no human relationship where there is no misunderstanding occurring at some point in that relationship. Of course, the more you practice, gain feedback, an...

I was talking with my wife yesterday about our favourite subjects in school. We were thinking about what we have gained from the years we spent in school. As we were talking and talking, I realized something about myself. I didn't remember the things that I studied just to pass the exam. The things I memorized, almost all of them disappeared from memory now. What a shame. However, the things that I found interesting, whether it be in class, outside of class, in textbook, etc, those were the things that stuck with me until today. Even if those things didn't make it into the exam papers, I still remember them. In some cases, I still apply them in my life. The things I found interesting...those are the things I remember. What's my point? My point is not that exams are not important. They are a part of our lives, a part of the system, and until we can find a better way to implement a better way to measure progress in schools, we have to adapt and live with exams....

Even the best of us has our weak moments, when our emotions blur our eyes and our better judgment. That is one of the features of being human. It is a packaged deal. Having said that, it is not an excuse for us human beings not to put in the effort to get our emotions in check. You can't make a strong argument to defend your emotional misbehaviours by saying, "Hey, I'm human!" If that is the case, then there will be so many wrong actions unaccounted for because people can simply get away with it by simply making a statement about how human they are. The idea that we are human and that we are not perfect is sound and just. But, when it is used as an excuse to commit something wrong, then the same innocent statement can become evil. As a counter measure, we need to instil in ourselves the idea of not just being a human being, but being a responsible human being - someone who takes ownership of his choices and face the consequences of those choices. Though t...